Southland Christian Ministry Training
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By Ian, on September 26th, 2010%
There are some weeks when it feels like no matter what I do, I just can’t get ahead. You don’t need me to tell you that life is sometimes hard, and we all go through difficult times, but how do we deal with those issues that get us down? This week I have been reminded of what happens when people just deny they have a problem or adopt poor coping mechanisms – out of control stress, depression, relationship breakdowns, alcohol abuse and other self destructive behaviour. The scary thing is that there have been times over the last few days when that has been internal and not external!
That is the bad news, the good new is that it doesn’t have to be like that! Although you might feel like a victim and it seems like you are unable to do anything about your situation, you CAN! My first go at this ponderings I came up with seven things you could do… but it just did not ring true for me, and where I am at, so I decided to tell you a story.
 I first met Bruce when he was probably only 16 or 17, and I was 15. He was the opposite of me in every way. By that age he had already tried everything, he smoked heavily, was an alcoholic, dabbled in drugs, was covered in tattoos and had a police record. He was qualified to do nothing and only got a job as a storeman because the boss wanted to give him a chance. He couldn’t seem to get his life together, and at every corner things just got worse. One night while smoking in bed, heavily under the influence of alcohol, things happened and the boarding house where he lived burnt down. He fronted up to work next morning with nothing but the clothes on his back, and his boss, (my father) invited him to live at our place till he could get his life sorted out.
My life from that point my life changed, as I began to understand that I had everything going for me. I had a stable, loving family, a good education, healthy self esteem, hope for the future and the belief that God was in control. As Bruce would say that is easy for you – I have NONE of that! Yet in the years to follow my brother Bruce taught me basic counselling skills, as we worked to overcome his bad start in life, we laughed and cried through many and varied crises. He emerged from those struggles with a strong faith and was able to establish a stable family for his children but bore the scars of those early years for the rest of his life.
Why tell you this very personal story? Because I needed to remind myself that bad things do happen to good people. We cannot control what has happened to us in the past, or our family background but we can choose our response. Sometimes it is only when we get to the very bottom that we are forced to accept the truth about ourselves and the need to take desperate action. Maybe you too are in one of those crises, what are you going to do about it? If you have admitted that your life has become unmanageable and that you are powerless to fix it, you have reached step one of the AA process. My job is to help you with step 2, to come to believe that there is a higher power that can help to restore your sanity… yes, it is possible but nobody ever said it would be easy.
Chaplain Ian Whitley
By Ian Whitley, on June 4th, 2010%
There is a very old story about a man who lived in a village called Nowhere, and while most of the occupants were content, he hated it! He wanted to go to a place called Somewhere, where he would find peace and happiness. It haunted his dreams till one day he took a leap of faith and left Nowhere to being his journey to Somewhere.
Before too long he came to a village and enthusiastically asked if this was Somewhere. No! They told him – you are on the right road but you will never find it if you don’t have a dream in your eye! Where do I get that? He asked and they sent him to The Ancient in the village who opened his eyes to a vision of Somewhere and so he continued his journey.
Surely this next village will be Somewhere, but no, they said – you are on the right track but you need more than a dream in your eye, you need a voice in your ear as well. But where do I find that he asked? They sent him to the top of a high mountain that overshadowed the village. As he struggled towards the top he heard the call of God in his ears, clarifying the vision he had already received and confirming that he was going in the right direction.
At the next village he was dismayed to find that he had still not arrived at Somewhere and the area he needed to pass through was hostile, and if he was to continue he would need a sword in his hand. This was against his principles but he finally agreed and The Ancient in the village presented him with a book which gave him both offensive and defensive capabilities to overcome all the forces against him. This knowledge helped him to courageously stand against the evil that tried to send him back to Nowhere.
Finally he came to another village – surely this is Somewhere, but no, you have a dream in your eye and a voice in your ear and a sword in your hand but you lack a song in your heart. It was then that he realised that he was so task orientated – focussing on getting to Somewhere that he had failed to enjoy the journey and appreciate the journey of the road and suddenly it all made sense.
God calls all of us to be going Somewhere. He wants to give us a dream in our eye and a vision for the future. He wants to speak to us and give us a voice in our ear so that we can learn what is really important. To continue that journey He calls us to take courage and face our enemies with a sword in our hand – the Word of God. Finally He shows us even through the hard times that it is not just the end of the road that brings joy – but we need to have a song in our hearts each day of the journey and in His good time we will reach Somewhere!
Chaplain Ian Whitley
By Ian Whitley, on May 24th, 2010%
There once was a little boy who decided he wanted to find God. He knew it would probably be a long trip, so he decided to pack a lunch – four packs of chips and two cans of soft drink. He set out on his journey and went a few blocks until he came to a park. On one of the park benches sat an old woman looking at the pigeons. The little boy sat down beside her and watched the pigeons too. When he grew hungry, he pulled out some chips. As he ate, he noticed the woman watching him, so he offered her a pack of chips. She accepted gratefully and smiled at him. He thought she had the most beautiful smile in the world. Wanting to see it again, he opened a can of soft drink and offered her the other. Once again she smiled that beautiful smile.
For a long time the two sat on that park bench eating chips and drinking soft drink, smiling at each other, and watching the pigeons. Neither said a word. Finally the little boy realised that it was getting late and he needed to go home . He started to leave, took a few steps, turned back and gave the woman a big hug. Her smile was brighter than ever before.
When he arrived home, his mother noticed that he was happy, but strangely quiet. “What did you do today?” she asked. “Oh, I had lunch in the park with God,” he said. Before his mother could reply, he added “You know, she has the most beautiful smile in the world.”
Meanwhile, the woman left the park and returned home. Her son noticed something different about her. “What did you do today, Mum?” has asked. “Oh, I ate chips and drank soft drink in the park with God.” And before her son could say anything at all, she added, “You know, God’s a lot younger than I had imagined.”
We see what we want to see and we miss all sorts of opportunities because we don’t even look. You never know when you might meet God. He might not be what you expect but when it happens you too will be changed!
Chaplain Ian Whitley
By Ian Whitley, on November 12th, 2009%
My job is very simple, all I have to do is three things:
- Listen to stories
- Tell stories and
- Help make connections between our stories and God’s story!
Ok, it is not quite that simple, there are always a range of levels to our stories, and whether we are listening to them or telling them, it is often difficult to make the right connections – even when it seems obvious! Why? To reveal our real story is to be vulnerable and maybe admit that we need to do something. We would prefer to stay in denial! But growth and healing will only result when we honestly confront the choices we have made that have brought us to where we are, and look at the possibility that although we cannot change the past we can change the future.
The story is told of the young child who was new to Sunday School. He loved it! His father asked what the story was about. The boy related how the Israelis were in a tight spot, with Pharaoh and his army chasing them. They were unable to go any further because the Red Sea blocked their way. So Moses called in the Air Force to bomb the Egyptians and then the Israeli Army built a pontoon bridge for the people to cross over. Poor Dad was shocked, “Is that the way they told the story?” “Well, not exactly”, the boy admitted, “but if I told it the way they told it, you would never believe it!”
How are you telling your story? Are you trying to make it more believable by adjusting the facts? Or are you going to honestly address the real issues and believe that God still works miracles? If you need some help to tell your story, find someone you trust, a Padre, Priest or Minister, to share it with.
Chaplain Ian Whitley
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I first met Bruce when he was probably only 16 or 17, and I was 15. He was the opposite of me in every way. By that age he had already tried everything, he smoked heavily, was an alcoholic, dabbled in drugs, was covered in tattoos and had a police record. He was qualified to do nothing and only got a job as a storeman because the boss wanted to give him a chance. He couldn’t seem to get his life together, and at every corner things just got worse. One night while smoking in bed, heavily under the influence of alcohol, things happened and the boarding house where he lived burnt down. He fronted up to work next morning with nothing but the clothes on his back, and his boss, (my father) invited him to live at our place till he could get his life sorted out.
