Southland Christian Ministry Training
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By Ian, on May 4th, 2011%
I am currently working on a new job… training mentors. In looking at the information I will be presenting I was prompted to consider the mentors that have impacted my life. Some of them I chose, some were thrust upon me, some were good, some were not so good, but ALL of them left an impact and helped mould me into who I am today. But what makes a good mentor? As I pondered the characteristics of my mentors, their diverse methods, approaches and backgrounds, and I came up with four characteristics that defined the good ones:
- CONSISTENCY! Good mentors are reliable, the standards never change and they will always tell you the truth, when you have done a good job AND when you stuff up! They know who they are, where they are going and where they are tryng to lead you, and will consistently stay on track.
- AUTHENTICITY! The mentors I respect are the ones that modelled openness and honesty in their own lives as well as expecting the same from me. They were not hypocrites who demanded one thing from me and did the opposite when they thought I wouldn’t notice. They were true to the core, even able to admit their own problems and failures.
- UNSELFISHNESS! Those who impacted me most were the ones who gave themselves unselfishly, who in their own busy schedules made time to teach and train me, giving sacrificially with little or no thought for what they would get out of it.
- PERSISTANCY! In my experience, good mentors refused to quit, even when I did stupid things!
They did not just forget it, they dealt with the real issues and then gave me another chance, even when I didn’t think that I deserved it! You might think that you are only a mentor for a year, but good mentors will persist for many years to come!
So, whether you are a mentor or a mentoree (and many of us are both) these are the characteristics you should be working on. They are in tune with RAAF values and what God expects of us.
Maybe this is a good time to stop and think about your mentors, particularly the ones that made a positive impact. Have you ever thanked them? Do something about it today!
Chaplain Ian S Whitley
By Ian, on April 27th, 2011%
This week while away in Glenbrook with a group of senior chaplains I was challenged to consider what makes a successful chaplain who can keep going for the long term. We talked about the pressures we face and the issues that get at us, but not much about how to overcome these things. In my role at RAAF Wagga I often counsel people about the need for balance in life, but this week as I reviewed my own life it did not look all that successful, so here is a list of ten things I am trying to implement to rebalance my life:
Slow down! I need to adopt a more realistic expectation of myself and others. I seem to be continually suffering from “hurry sickness”, I will never catch up, so it is not going to matter if I slow up a little! And enjoy the view along the way!
Umpire! I need to find somebody to be my personal coach and mentor. I have said this for years but I have not done it! Why?
Cognitive restructuring! I can choose to change the way I think, and though it is not easy, over time I can change my perspective on issues and my attitudes to them.
Consistent Input! I have to make sure that my input is greater than my output, and seek to learn something new every day. That might mean not doing some other things.
Eat and Exercise healthily! Sadly I have allowed myself to put on those extra kgs, so I have to take responsibility for that and make some changes to my daily program.
Self knowledge! I need to know my gifts and abilities as well as admit my limitations. It is only as I am honest about these things that I can take steps to address them.
Sabbath! The manufacturer’s instructions recommend at least one day off per week and failure to do so will void the warranty. I can’t blame God for my illness when I have neglected the proper balance between work and rest.
 Fun! My wife tells me that I have forgotten how to have fun and laugh. We were made to enjoy life and not just endure it so don’t take it so seriously, lighten up and have a good laugh.
Understand the plan! We all need to know where we are going, so maybe it is time to clarify your goals and get excited about where God is leading you.
Love and accept love! We all need relationships, a place where we are accepted and belong. Families are important, yet if we keep putting them on the bottom of the priority list, when we need them they will not be there.
Well, they are some of the things I learnt this week. I’m still not sure what the chaplaincy branch will look like in 2015, but I am sure that God is in control and that His vision of the future requires me to more balanced! Success if not about doing more things, it’s about doing the right things better. Maybe it is time for you to rethink what it means to be successful???
Chaplain Ian Whitley
By Ian, on March 25th, 2011%
There are some weeks that I seem to be a magnet for angry, hurting, frustrated people. While filling in for the 1RTU chaplain I also did some presentations on communication, workplace relations and ethics, but somehow putting those concepts into practice with difficult people never gets any easier. Been there? While pondering this gulf between theory and practice I had to admit that maybe it would be easier if I had a quick checklist. So, the next time an angry, hurt, frustrated person walks into your office (or home) work through this list:
- Be Open! Don’t make a hasty judgement and reject them on the basis of how you feel. Choose NOT to get defensive, and be open to the fact that they may have good reason for reacting the way they are. They may have come to you because they trust you, so don’t blow it by acting busy.
- Listen actively! Let them vent their feelings, encourage them to keep talking by asking open ended questions. Resist the urge to interrupt and give easy quick fix solutions before they are really finished describing their problem. Give them your undivided attention, look at their body language as well as what they are saying or not saying.
- Check for accuracy! Give them some feedback as to what you have heard. This will require a calm confident assessment of what the issue is and how they feel about it. Seek to get any others facts or documentation that may have led up to this problem.
- Express empathy! Telling them they are stupid for feeling the way they do will not help. Seek to understand what it would be like to be in their shoes, and validate their feelings. You may never have been in their situation, but to recognise and verbalise their depth of feeling gives you the opportunity to begin helping.
- Determine direction! Find out what they think would be an ideal solution. This may be totally unrealistic, but it is the obvious place to start. They may see this as the only option, but your role is to help them find a range of possible solutions to be assessed. At this point you may also need to get other specialist input as to how some of these options will affect other parts of the organisation. Make a decision!
- Develop action plan! Clearly describe what you are going to do and what you expect them to do to put this plan into practice. Don’t be afraid to document this process as this may save a lot of heartache in the future for all concerned.
- Do it! No matter how good the plan may be if it is not implemented nothing changes! Follow through and make sure that you express your thanks to the person for raising it and helping to resolve it. This may also give you an opportunity to make sure that they have done what they agreed to do.
Finally, remember that sometimes the actual cause of their anger and frustration may be systemic, and patting yourself on the back for how well you handled the individual may not address the real issue. Step 8 therefore will require you to assess and address the wider context of the complaint.
Chaplain Ian S Whitley
By Ian, on March 12th, 2011%
 Periodically I have an opportunity to play at being (or becoming) a theologian. One opportunity came when I got together in Canberra with a range of other want-to-be theologians from diverse backgrounds and churches. Our purpose was to discuss recent trends in theology and examine how they apply to life in the real world. We did lots of the first but not much of the second!
But what did I learn? Well, it did remind me of a story. I am currently building a garage. I did my homework and worked out that the best and cheapest option was to purchase one in kit form and put it together myself. The salesman was confident that anybody could put it together “yes, you and your wife will have no trouble”. I niavely believed him…thinking it may not be easy, but all I have to do is follow the instructions.
The so-called instructions were just the engineering specs and the plans to be submitted to council. But all I had to do was put the pieces of the jig saw puzzle together – just start at the bottom and work up! Then I found that some bits required more brute force than we had available. Other sections required extra-ordinary long arms when we only had standard ones. There were building techniques that required three sets of hands when we only had two available. There were times when we despaired of ever finishing it because it was not obvious how it really fitted together and where do these other bits “fit”?
 It's All Greek To Me... Seems to me that many people come to faith like that. They are told they can do it – they sign up and are assured they have all the bits required, all you have to do is follow the instructions. They look at the instructions – the Bible and find that it is in code! They decide they can do it without being able to decode the specs, but run into a whole range of other problems and give up in a mess and walking away from a half completed garage in total frustration. What went wrong? They did not get any help with theology! My role as a theologian is to breakdown the engineering specs and plans and develop some step by step instructions of how to really put it together, including some trade secrets on easy ways to do it.
I finished the garage, but still have to work out what to do with all the leftover bits. But my real job here is to help others to build their lives and maybe help them see and interpret God’s overall plan.
Chaplain Ian S Whitley
By Ian, on March 4th, 2011%
 Teaching Air Force Recruits is not always easy and the Padre gets some of the interesting topics like leadership and followership, seeking to help the recruits adjust to the challenges of communal living in a military environment. Here, workplace relations is a 24/7 job with very little private space or time. My role is to help recruits discuss the lessons learnt from watching segments from the movie “We Were Soldiers”, and assess how both leaders and followers acted and reacted in various situations.
While pondering the results I came up with 7 lessons we ALL need to learn:
1. LISTEN! No matter where you are in the chain of command it is imperative that you really pay attention. Multi-tasking is great but when orders are being given you need to be concentrating on one thing – getting the right information and getting it right.
2. EDUCATE! Each of us is under obligation to keep learning and sharing what we are learning with others. We all have different gifts and abilities, and when we share our knowledge we empower each other, so that the whole team benefits. A swift, agile, decisive response is no good if it is based on wrong information.
3. ASK RIGHT QUESTIONS! This is one area that recruits struggle with because they think that they will be labelled. That only happens when you ask the wrong questions as a result of not listening! Asking for clarification so that the task and the process can be carried out correctly is allowed and encouraged. Sometimes the key is asking the right questions at the right time.
4. DON’T INTERUPT! In an orders group all questions are to be kept till the end of the brief, therefore get used to taking notes which include things you may need clarified. Sadly we are not very good at this – we are all too eager to come up with easy solutions before we have heard the full story and so get it wrong.
5. EXAMPLE! Our words and our actions must agree. There is no place in the military for double standards – our real values are the ones we live out when no one is watching. Therefore seek to be a positive example to those around you, not just to impress others but because you know it is the right thing to do.
6. RESPECT! We are not all the same, we each have different gifts and abilities, we may come from different ethnic and cultural backgrounds, we may wear different ranks or have a different uniform but we are all part of the same team. That team will only function if we all respect each other, and demonstrate it by how we relate up and down the chain of command.
7. SMILE! Finally, a swift, decisive, resilient, respected Air Force also needs to be able to laugh. Humour is the social lubricant that reduces friction in the barrack block, in the workplace and even in the battle space. Don’t take yourself so seriously, make time every day to relax and enjoy what you have got.
So, what started as a lesson on workplace relations became for me an affirmation that as defence members we are all called to be both followers and leaders! No matter what your rank, you are still required to be answerable to someone, and ultimately you may be required to plead your case before God. If that scares you, maybe you should join us for chapel service and listen to what he expects of us as leaders and followers.
Chaplain Ian S Whitley
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